| | joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) |  |
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+8che zenyaika Jhoanna tiagong_akyat Ayeshah daryll Ailou barbz 12 posters |
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Jhoanna
Gender : 
Date Joined : 2008-01-20
Reputation : 49
 |  Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)  Mon Apr 21 2008, 11:31 | |
| cute nito ha! ayaw ni erap ng 8 slices at marami kaya 4 nlng...  kakaloka din ung speech! thank you sis, luv it!  | |
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barbz
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-03-19
Reputation : 0
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 11:37 | |
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Ailou
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-21
Reputation : 129
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:16 | |
|  Ninja turtles na si Kuba si Jolibee naging tindahan ng pulot | |
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Guest
Guest
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:21 | |
| Teacher: Juan, read your 500-word essay Juan: Okay mam!Ü My muning, bow! i have a muning! My muning`s lost, so i went outside the house to look for my muning. MUNING(478 times) |
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Guest
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| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:29 | |
| pacquiao: honey, buksan mo na yung sweets. jinky: nasan honey? ang lambing mo naman, may pasalubong ka pa sa akin! pacquiao: yung sweets ng ilaw! ang dilim kaya! |
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Ailou
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-21
Reputation : 129
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:47 | |
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Ailou
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-21
Reputation : 129
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Jhoanna
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-20
Reputation : 49
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:04 | |
| naku kailangan ko pa tong imail kay father para magets ko lahat! pero parang super funny sya ha! lalo na ung do not do unto others... | |
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Ayeshah
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-04-07
Reputation : 0
| | Subject: eto pa joke Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:05 | |
| THE VOWELS OF SEX ACCORDING TO WOMEN
aahhh - napasukan
eehhh - naliitan
iihhh - nalakihan
oohhh - nasarapan
uuhhh - nilabasan
VIRGIN AGAIN
Woman: Thanks, Doc for making me a virgin again for my wedding night. It was perfect! The blood, the pain, and it only cost me P50. How did you do it?
Doc: I just tied your pubic hair together.
Ms. UNIVERSE PAGEANT
Emcee: What is the essence of a woman?
Ms. Venezuela: Por que me regla con todo pacasta mala importante birhen ca pa.
Ms. Puerto Rico: Perfecta figura mala importante malaque poque.
TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH
"Mas bago! A new napkin especially made to satisfy women.introducing... New Whisper with Tongue! Keeps you wet all the time!"
T.I.I.S.
At 21, women proudly say "I'm part of T.G.I.S." - Thank God I'm Single! At 31, women strongly say "I'm part of T.I.I.S." - 'Tang-Ina I'm Single!
TWINS TALKING INSIDE THE WOMB
1: Ano gusto mo paglaki?
2: Doctor. Eh ikaw?
1: Pulis, para huli ko kalbo na may balbas, labas pasok dito, dura pa. Bastos siya!
AT A MOVIE HOUSE
Girl: Honey, the man beside me is masturbating.
BF: Just ignore him, dear.
Girl: I can't. He's using my hand!
HUBAD NA
Girl: Hubad mo na bra ko.
Boy: Iyan hubad na.
Girl: Hubad mo na rin panty ko.
Boy: 'Yan hubad na rin.
Girl: Sa susuenod huwag na huwag mong gagamitin ang mga gamit ko, walanghiya!
AT A MOVIE HOUSE 2
Girl: Aray! Slowly naman ohh!
Boy: Slowly na nga eh.
Girl: (hurt again) Aray! Alisin mo na nga 'yang singsing mo.
Boy: Tange! Relos ko 'yan!
ANOTHER MAN FINGERING ANOTHER GIRLFRIEND INSIDE A MOVIE HOUSE
Boy: Honey, naiwan ang college ring ko sa loob!
Girl: Bilis kunin mo!
Boy: Ayan... teka ba't La Salle 'to eh Atenista ako!
HONEYMOON
Mikee Cojuanco: Honey, i-shoot mong mabuti ha!
Dudut Jaworski: Oo ba, basta galingan mong mangabayo!]
NO SIGNAL
A policeman saw a man on the top floor of a building.
Police: 'Wag kang tatalon! Marami pang nagmamahal sa 'yo!
Man: Tumahimik ka! 'Wag mo kong pakialaman! 'Di ako maka-send!
POTATO
Two wives are buying of gulay in the local market.
Wife 1: You know mare, whenever I see a potato naaalala ko ang itlog ng mister ko.
Wife 2: Bakit??? Ganyan ba kalaki???
Wife 1: Hindi, ganyan kadumi!!!
ITLOG NA PULA
Two wives are buying of itlog in the local market.
Wife 1: You know mare, whenever I see a itlog na pula naaalala ko ang itlog ng mister ko.
Wife 2: Bakit??? Ganyan ba kapula???
Wife 1: Hindi, ganyan kaalat!!!
BUHOK
Tanong: Anong mabilis pumuti, buhok sa itaas o buhok sa ibaba?
Sagot: Buhok sa itaas – kase ang buhok sa itaas puro problema pero ang buhok sa ibaba puro ligaya
SECOND THOUGHT
Amo: Inday, pagdating ng buyer ng bahay, sabihin mo na nag-sesecond thought pa kami ng sir mo.
Maid: Upu, Mam!
Later…
Buyer: Saan ang amo mo?
Maid: Si Sir pu at si Mam eh nagsisikentut pa pu.
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Last edited by ayeshah on Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:20; edited 2 times in total | |
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Jhoanna
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-20
Reputation : 49
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:10 | |
| damin mong kalokohan sis ha! thank you for sharing, wait ko pa ung mga darating! | |
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Jhoanna
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-20
Reputation : 49
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:18 | |
| creative tlaga ang mga pinoy! :singing: | |
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Ayeshah
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-04-07
Reputation : 0
| | Subject: ala lang masaya ako today!lolz Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:20 | |
| Kapag Walang Bolpen, Walang Notes...
Kapag Walang Notes, Walang Pag-aaral...
Kapag Walang Pag-aaral, Walang Diploma...
Kapag Walang Diploma, Walang Trabaho...
Kapag Walang Trabaho, Walang Pera...
Kapag Walang Pera, Walang Pagkain...
Kapag Walang Pagkain, Magugutom...
Kapag Walang Nagutom, Papayat...
Kapag Walang Pumayat, Papanget...
Kapag Walang Pumanget, Walang Syota...
Kapag Walang Syota, Walang Asawa...
Kapag Walang Asawa, Walang Anak...
Kapag Walang Anak, Madedepress...
Kapag Walang Nadepress, Magkakasakit...
Kapag Walang Nagkasakit, Mamamatay...
Kapag Walang Namatay, Wala ka na!
Kaya ingatan mo ang Ballpen mo!
If American movie titles were translated to Tagalog...
1. Black hawk down - ibong maitim sa ibaba
2. dead man's chest - dodo ng patay
3. i know what you did last summer - uyy... aminin!
4. love, actually - sa totoo lang, pag-ibig
5. million dollar baby - 48.9 million pisong sanggol
6. the blair witch project - ang proyekto ng bruhang si blair
7. mary poppins - si mariang may putok
8. snakes on a plane - nag-ahasan sa ere
9. the postman always rings twice - ang kartero kapag dumutdot laging
dalawang beses
10. sum of all fears - takot mo, takot ko, takot nating lahat
11. swordfish - talakitok
12. pretty woman - ganda ng lola mo
13. robin hood, men in tights - si robin hood at ang mga felix bakat
14. 4 weddings & a funeral - kahit 4 na beses ka pang magpakasal,
mamamatay ka rin
15. the good, the bad and the ugly - ako, ikaw, kayong lahat
16. harry potter and the sorcerer's stone - adik si harry, tumira ng
shabu
17. click - isang pindot ka lang
18. brokeback mountain - may nawasak sa likod ng bundok ng tralala
/bumigay sa bundok
19. the day of the death - ayaw tumayo (ng mga patay)
20. waterworld - basang-basa
21. there's something about mary - may kwan sa ano ni maria
22. employee of the month - ang sipsip
23. resident evil - ang biyenan
24. kill bill - kilitiin sa bilbil
25. the grudge - lintik lang ang walang ganti
26. nightmare before christmas - binangungot sa noche buena
27. annie hall - ang butas ni annie
28. never been kissed - pangit kasi
29. gone in 60 seconds - 1 round, tulog
30. the fast and the furious - ang bitin, galit
31. too fast, too furious - kapag sobrang bitin, sobrang galit
32. dude, where's my car - dong, anong level ulit tayo nag-park?
33. beauty and the beast - ang asawa ko at ang nanay nya
34. the lord of the rings - ang alahero
3 Guys nagkasala sa tribo nila...
Lider: Dala kayo dito sampu pareho na prutas!
...
Una balik si Juan, dala sampung santol.
Lider: Ipasok sa iyong pwet lahat ng santol, ang umaray o tatawa patayin!
Una palang na santol umaray na si Juan... Patay!
Sunod si Pedro, dala ubas...
Nang ika-10 na ubas biglang tumawa, Patay!
Nagkita sa Juan at si Pedro sa langit...
Juan: Buhay ka pa sana sa last na ubas. Ba't ka pa kasi tumawa?
Pedro: Nakita ko si Berto may dalang 10 langka! | |
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Jhoanna
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-20
Reputation : 49
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:23 | |
| walng tatalo sa pinoy basta sa kalokohan! cge bye friend! | |
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Jhoanna
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-20
Reputation : 49
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:27 | |
| wow Philippines! joke pero totoo u! khit ako takot pumunta o mg labas ng mga bagay n nakakaakit sa paningin ng masasamang tao sa nabanggit na lugar!  | |
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barbz
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-03-19
Reputation : 0
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barbz
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-03-19
Reputation : 0
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:46 | |
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katya
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-22
Reputation : 3
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 14:42 | |
| ganda.. | |
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katya
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-22
Reputation : 3
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 14:44 | |
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tiagong_akyat
Gender : 
Date Joined : 2008-03-18
Reputation : 9
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 16:04 | |
| pano yan naubusan ng tinta ballpen ko. | |
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sheryl ann
Gender :
Date Joined : 2008-01-22
Reputation : 29
| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) Mon Apr 21 2008, 16:50 | |
| naku puro pala wala | |
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| | Subject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) | |
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| | joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads) | |
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ganitong-ganito nga sila magsalita lalo n ung mga tubong batangas..ala eh katawa nman ire 
