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Jhoanna
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 11:31

cute nito ha! ayaw ni erap ng 8 slices at marami kaya 4 nlng... rolling 4 laugh kakaloka din ung speech! thank you sis, luv it! lots of laugh

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barbz
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 11:37

kaloka naman un kuba... nyahhh nyahhh nyahhh
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 11:52

like ko din ung kuba rolling 4 laugh tnx natawa n nman ako ngaun.. nyahhh
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 11:55

namiz ko tuloy ang mga batangueno.. day dreaming ganitong-ganito nga sila magsalita lalo n ung mga tubong batangas..ala eh katawa nman ire nyahhh
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 11:58

nyahhh chicken nga..itlog pla ang nakuha
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:06

pinas nga nman tsk,tsk,tsk :hay: nyahhh
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:09

hahahha..wrong gramming nyahhh cge bye frend rolling 4 laugh
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Ailou
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:16

nyahhh nyahhh Ninja turtles na si Kuba
si Jolibee naging tindahan ng pulot

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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:21

Teacher: Juan, read your 500-word essay
Juan: Okay mam!Ü

My muning, bow! i have a muning!
My muning`s lost, so i went
outside the house to look for
my muning.

MUNING(478 times)

nyahhh
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:29

pacquiao: honey, buksan mo na yung sweets.
jinky: nasan honey? ang lambing mo naman, may pasalubong ka pa sa akin!
pacquiao: yung sweets ng ilaw! ang dilim kaya!

nyahhh nyahhh nyahhh
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:47

Roselyn wrote:
pacquiao: honey, buksan mo na yung sweets.
jinky: nasan honey? ang lambing mo naman, may pasalubong ka pa sa akin!
pacquiao: yung sweets ng ilaw! ang dilim kaya!

nyahhh nyahhh nyahhh
Natawa din ako jan sis nyahhh nyahhh

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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 12:59

nyahhh nyahhh wala ako naintindihan

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Jhoanna
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:04

naku kailangan ko pa tong imail kay father para magets ko lahat! pero parang super funny sya ha! rolling 4 laugh lalo na ung do not do unto others...

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Ayeshah
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PostSubject: eto pa joke   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:05

THE VOWELS OF SEX ACCORDING TO WOMEN

aahhh - napasukan

eehhh - naliitan

iihhh - nalakihan

oohhh - nasarapan

uuhhh - nilabasan




VIRGIN AGAIN

Woman: Thanks, Doc for making me a virgin again for my wedding night. It was perfect! The blood, the pain, and it only cost me P50. How did you do it?

Doc: I just tied your pubic hair together.



Ms. UNIVERSE PAGEANT

Emcee: What is the essence of a woman?

Ms. Venezuela: Por que me regla con todo pacasta mala importante birhen ca pa.

Ms. Puerto Rico: Perfecta figura mala importante malaque poque.



TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH

"Mas bago! A new napkin especially made to satisfy women.introducing... New Whisper with Tongue! Keeps you wet all the time!"



T.I.I.S.

At 21, women proudly say "I'm part of T.G.I.S." - Thank God I'm Single! At 31, women strongly say "I'm part of T.I.I.S." - 'Tang-Ina I'm Single!



TWINS TALKING INSIDE THE WOMB

1: Ano gusto mo paglaki?

2: Doctor. Eh ikaw?

1: Pulis, para huli ko kalbo na may balbas, labas pasok dito, dura pa. Bastos siya!



AT A MOVIE HOUSE

Girl: Honey, the man beside me is masturbating.

BF: Just ignore him, dear.

Girl: I can't. He's using my hand!




HUBAD NA

Girl: Hubad mo na bra ko.

Boy: Iyan hubad na.

Girl: Hubad mo na rin panty ko.

Boy: 'Yan hubad na rin.

Girl: Sa susuenod huwag na huwag mong gagamitin ang mga gamit ko, walanghiya!



AT A MOVIE HOUSE 2

Girl: Aray! Slowly naman ohh!

Boy: Slowly na nga eh.

Girl: (hurt again) Aray! Alisin mo na nga 'yang singsing mo.

Boy: Tange! Relos ko 'yan!



ANOTHER MAN FINGERING ANOTHER GIRLFRIEND INSIDE A MOVIE HOUSE

Boy: Honey, naiwan ang college ring ko sa loob!

Girl: Bilis kunin mo!

Boy: Ayan... teka ba't La Salle 'to eh Atenista ako!


HONEYMOON

Mikee Cojuanco: Honey, i-shoot mong mabuti ha!

Dudut Jaworski: Oo ba, basta galingan mong mangabayo!]



NO SIGNAL

A policeman saw a man on the top floor of a building.

Police: 'Wag kang tatalon! Marami pang nagmamahal sa 'yo!

Man: Tumahimik ka! 'Wag mo kong pakialaman! 'Di ako maka-send!



POTATO

Two wives are buying of gulay in the local market.

Wife 1: You know mare, whenever I see a potato naaalala ko ang itlog ng mister ko.

Wife 2: Bakit??? Ganyan ba kalaki???

Wife 1: Hindi, ganyan kadumi!!!



ITLOG NA PULA

Two wives are buying of itlog in the local market.

Wife 1: You know mare, whenever I see a itlog na pula naaalala ko ang itlog ng mister ko.

Wife 2: Bakit??? Ganyan ba kapula???

Wife 1: Hindi, ganyan kaalat!!!



BUHOK

Tanong: Anong mabilis pumuti, buhok sa itaas o buhok sa ibaba?

Sagot: Buhok sa itaas – kase ang buhok sa itaas puro problema pero ang buhok sa ibaba puro ligaya



SECOND THOUGHT

Amo: Inday, pagdating ng buyer ng bahay, sabihin mo na nag-sesecond thought pa kami ng sir mo.

Maid: Upu, Mam!

Later…

Buyer: Saan ang amo mo?

Maid: Si Sir pu at si Mam eh nagsisikentut pa pu.







\


Last edited by ayeshah on Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:20; edited 2 times in total
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Jhoanna
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:10

damin mong kalokohan sis ha! rolling 4 laugh thank you for sharing, wait ko pa ung mga darating!

________________________________
“If my mind can conceive it, and my heart can believe it, I know I can achieve it.”good luck
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Jhoanna
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:18

creative tlaga ang mga pinoy! :singing:

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Ayeshah
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PostSubject: ala lang masaya ako today!lolz   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:20

Kapag Walang Bolpen, Walang Notes...

Kapag Walang Notes, Walang Pag-aaral...

Kapag Walang Pag-aaral, Walang Diploma...

Kapag Walang Diploma, Walang Trabaho...

Kapag Walang Trabaho, Walang Pera...

Kapag Walang Pera, Walang Pagkain...

Kapag Walang Pagkain, Magugutom...

Kapag Walang Nagutom, Papayat...

Kapag Walang Pumayat, Papanget...

Kapag Walang Pumanget, Walang Syota...

Kapag Walang Syota, Walang Asawa...

Kapag Walang Asawa, Walang Anak...

Kapag Walang Anak, Madedepress...

Kapag Walang Nadepress, Magkakasakit...

Kapag Walang Nagkasakit, Mamamatay...

Kapag Walang Namatay, Wala ka na!

Kaya ingatan mo ang Ballpen mo!










If American movie titles were translated to Tagalog...


1. Black hawk down - ibong maitim sa ibaba
2. dead man's chest - dodo ng patay
3. i know what you did last summer - uyy... aminin!
4. love, actually - sa totoo lang, pag-ibig
5. million dollar baby - 48.9 million pisong sanggol
6. the blair witch project - ang proyekto ng bruhang si blair
7. mary poppins - si mariang may putok
8. snakes on a plane - nag-ahasan sa ere
9. the postman always rings twice - ang kartero kapag dumutdot laging
dalawang beses
10. sum of all fears - takot mo, takot ko, takot nating lahat
11. swordfish - talakitok
12. pretty woman - ganda ng lola mo
13. robin hood, men in tights - si robin hood at ang mga felix bakat
14. 4 weddings & a funeral - kahit 4 na beses ka pang magpakasal,
mamamatay ka rin
15. the good, the bad and the ugly - ako, ikaw, kayong lahat
16. harry potter and the sorcerer's stone - adik si harry, tumira ng
shabu
17. click - isang pindot ka lang
18. brokeback mountain - may nawasak sa likod ng bundok ng tralala
/bumigay sa bundok
19. the day of the death - ayaw tumayo (ng mga patay)
20. waterworld - basang-basa
21. there's something about mary - may kwan sa ano ni maria
22. employee of the month - ang sipsip
23. resident evil - ang biyenan
24. kill bill - kilitiin sa bilbil
25. the grudge - lintik lang ang walang ganti
26. nightmare before christmas - binangungot sa noche buena
27. annie hall - ang butas ni annie
28. never been kissed - pangit kasi
29. gone in 60 seconds - 1 round, tulog
30. the fast and the furious - ang bitin, galit
31. too fast, too furious - kapag sobrang bitin, sobrang galit
32. dude, where's my car - dong, anong level ulit tayo nag-park?
33. beauty and the beast - ang asawa ko at ang nanay nya
34. the lord of the rings - ang alahero








3 Guys nagkasala sa tribo nila...


Lider: Dala kayo dito sampu pareho na prutas!
...
Una balik si Juan, dala sampung santol.


Lider: Ipasok sa iyong pwet lahat ng santol, ang umaray o tatawa patayin!

Una palang na santol umaray na si Juan... Patay!
Sunod si Pedro, dala ubas...
Nang ika-10 na ubas biglang tumawa, Patay!


Nagkita sa Juan at si Pedro sa langit...

Juan: Buhay ka pa sana sa last na ubas. Ba't ka pa kasi tumawa?
Pedro: Nakita ko si Berto may dalang 10 langka!
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Jhoanna
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:23

walng tatalo sa pinoy basta sa kalokohan! cge bye friend! rolling 4 laugh

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Jhoanna
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:27

wow Philippines! joke pero totoo u! khit ako takot pumunta o mg labas ng mga bagay n nakakaakit sa paningin ng masasamang tao sa nabanggit na lugar! no way

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barbz
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:41

nice joke nyahhh nyahhh
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barbz
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 13:46

nice... nyahhh nyahhh nyahhh
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katya
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 14:42

nyahhh ganda..
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katya
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 14:44

nyahhh nyahhh
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tiagong_akyat
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 16:04

pano yan naubusan ng tinta ballpen ko. nyahhh
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sheryl ann
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PostSubject: Re: joke joke(ayesha's Joke threads)   Mon Apr 21 2008, 16:50

naku puro pala wala nyahhh
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